What Not to Say In Divorce Court

Chances are, if your divorce case has made it to divorce court, it’s been an adversarial process and you have many strong emotions. While many divorcing spouses are able to communicate effectively and create a divorce settlement agreement covering all aspects of Colorado divorce, such as child custody, child support, the division of marital assets, and alimony, in other cases, one or more disputes arise, leading to a contested divorce argued before a judge. If you need assistance from a divorce lawyer in Fort Collins, reach out to The Law Offices of Stephen Vertucci, LLC today.

If your case requires divorce court, it’s essential to know what not to say in divorce court in Colorado, even when you feel frustrated, angry, or frightened.

Do Not Have Emotional Outbursts

Passions run high during a divorce, especially when issues over the division of assets and child custody aren’t negotiable and require a judge. However, it’s critical to maintain your composure in court. Displaying out-of-control emotions is especially detrimental to a child custody dispute when you must show the judge that it’s in your child’s best interests to continue having close contact with you. Avoid outbursts such as the following:

• Yelling insults at your spouse
• Hurling accusations at your spouse or their attorney
• Yelling at the judge
• Swearing
• Crying
• Begging the court or your spouse for things to go in your favor
• Making out-of-order statements or demands

Judges expect those going through divorce to have strong emotions, but they also expect adult behavior and formal decorum inside their courtrooms. Displaying strong emotions in court to the point of becoming disruptive or distracting does far more harm to your case than good.

Do Not Lie, Embellish, or Exaggerate

It may be tempting to lie or exaggerate in court to get the result you want out of your divorce. This is especially true if it involves a child custody dispute. Many parents feel like their time with their children is worth anything it takes to gain custody; however, it’s critical to tell the truth in court. Not only does a lie almost always end up revealed through the other party’s evidence, but lying in court is a crime with potential legal consequences, such as contempt of court charges resulting in fines and jail time. 

Being caught in a lie works against your goals. For instance, lying to a judge by falsely testifying that your spouse abuses or neglects your child may result in you losing your right to 50/50 shared custody, so your time with your children is reduced to visitation. 

Lying or hiding assets during the financial disclosure process or in court may result in your spouse receiving a greater portion of the assets.

Avoid Accusatory Language and Absolutes

Choosing your words carefully in court is almost as important as avoiding outright lies. Using absolutes such as “you always” or “you never” can quickly undermine your argument. For example, if you say, “you never spend time with the kids on the weekend,” and your spouse presents evidence that they took their children camping even once, it makes all of your other testimony suspect and reduces your credibility.

Avoid accusatory language such as blaming and criticizing. Instead, present only the facts of the case calmly and without animosity. When a judge feels that your words are factual and not based on emotion, it increases your credibility.

Do Not Disparage the Judge or the Court System

As difficult as it is to put your family’s future in the hands of a stranger in front of a courtroom, this is the reality of divorce court. A judge’s decisions are binding and enforceable. It’s critical that you maintain a calm, polite, and respectful demeanor. Do not criticize the judge or complain about the legal system or family court process while in court. Putting off the judge is unwise if you are hoping they will decide a matter in your favor.

How Can a Colorado Divorce Attorney Help?

If you are heading for a contested divorce, it’s critical to have experienced legal representation throughout the process. Your Fort Collins family law attorney will ensure that you are fully prepared for the court process, including advising you on your appearance and demeanor in front of the judge. Call The Law Offices of Stephen Vertucci, LLC for experienced legal counsel during your Colorado divorce.